Clear Blue...Pregnant?

This story begins many many years ago. I don't know if I always wanted children in the same way that other women crave having a baby. I love them, don't get me wrong, but it was always a "if it happens, great!" kind of thing for me. I tried for a few years to get pregnant, during my first marriage, but was told that, because of my PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome) it was going to be difficult and probably require medical intervention. This news just reinforced that "if it happens" feeling. As I approached my late 30's I had decided that it probably wouldn't happen for me and that by the time I reached 40 I would adopt. That drive to procreate was getting dimmer by the year.

A few years ago I met a man that I fell in love with and recently married....recently as in June 16, 2007. We talked about starting a family, he knew my history and was amiable to adopting if it came down to it. However, we thought that we'd at least give getting pregnant a shot (practicing is a lot of fun). I was not getting my hopes up and had pretty much made up my mind that we'd end up on the adoption rout. After all I'm 37 1/2, not exactly a prime baby making age even without the PCOS.

This past weekend I was sure my period was going to start. I've had my PCOS under control, to the best of my ability, for quite a while now and have been having regular 28 days cycles. So, when my friend had not shown up by Tuesday I was starting to think that I had miscalculated...or was I pregnant? I went ahead and bought a test, but held off another day before taking it. Past experience said that if I waited a day I would start...so why get my hopes up. Marc kept asking when I was going to take the test and I explained my logic for holding off...really, I just didn't want to be disappointed.

The next morning I bit the bullet and took the test. It was 6:00 in the morning and I was still half asleep and as I followed the directions I tried to temper my anticipation. I laid the test on the counter in the bathroom and walked away. Those three minutes ticked by pretty quickly and when I went back to check the results the test clearly said....PREGNANT. What??? I'm pregnant??? Holy Shhhhhhh, I don't believe it. I took the test to the bedroom and woke Marc up. I held up the test to show him and said, "Do you want to be called daddy or pops?"

So, our adventure begins....we've tried to temper our excitement, but it spills out around the edges, like when you squish a half melted ice cream sandwich. We promised to tell only our immediate family and of course have shared the news with a handful of other people. I'll feel better about telling more people once we get past the Doctor appointment on Monday and certainly after the first trimester is over.

Shefa and Danaly have encouraged me to document my experience, because so much gets forgotten as time goes on. While journaling has never been my forte I am going to give it a shot and see if I can keep up with it. I'm hoping that this will be a way to share this journey with friends and family.