I LOVE this artist!

My friend Leahe sent me this GORGEOUS card and I had to share it. It embodies how I have felt through most of my pregnancy. Thank you Leahe!

If you want to see more of this artist check out http://www.masha.com/. There are a couple of onsies and t-shrits that I may order in the near future.

I loved this card too...

Where has my motivation gone?!?

I feel a bit like I have senioritis, you know that feeling of I am about to graduate and that is all that matters right now, so forget any tests or homework assignments at this point. What does it matter?? I am about to graduate! Except that I am not graduating from high school but from this ten month period called pregnancy and instead of going off to college I will be joining the school of parenthood. I have a short list of things to finish for work and this week is my last before going on maternity leave! I have a little longer list of things that I would like to get done before Isaac arrives.

However, my motivation level is sooooo low right now. I feel like I am curling in on myself, kind of like he is curled up in my belly, resting up for the big day. I don't even really have the capacity to be that social right now. Which for me is saying something! So, I am trying to muster up what ever I have left to finish up these projects so that I can really just let go and rest until he arrives. Or just come to accept the fact that they won't get done and be okay with that too.

Marc and I had a date night last night and it was good to get out and spend some time talking about us and life before and after baby. It was interesting to find out that he's going through a similar process to mentally prepare for being father. We have both been trying to focus on the positive things that we learned and experienced from our childhoods so that we can share similar experiences with our son. We're both nervous about the kind of parents we will be and what those first weeks will look like. Only time will tell, but I think we will be better versions of ourselves in the end.

Today is day 5 before my due date. I had a lot of braxton hix contractions yesterday and it feels like he is a lot lower in my pelvis. Other than that I have all of the normal complaints of the last couple of weeks of pregnancy. I'm just trying to stay as positive as possible and not get stuck in the last trimester BLAHS!

Counting Down to "D" Day

I was thinking yesterday that now that I am in my 39th week, and Isaac could decide to come any day now, it would be a good idea to post brief daily updates so that if people were curious as to how things were progressing with the pregnancy they could check in here. So, starting today, look for daily updates.

I did go to the Dr. on Wednesday for a check up and everything is going fine. BP is good, he has a strong heartbeat, his head is down, and right now he is in the occiput posterior (OP) position. This means that he could be born facing up rather than down. I'm doing some recommended

exercises to try to encourage him to turn, we'll see how that goes. He seems pretty snug in there. It is possible that he will turn during delivery also so I'm not going to worry about that right now. Dr. Thomas did do a quick ultrasound and I got to see his face, but it was really hard to make details out. She had to point out twice where his eyes, nose and mouth were. I eventually realized that since he is upside down the orientation was making it hard for me to recognize body part. Thinking about his little face on the drive home made me a little emotional and I cried a little thinking about how excited I am to meet and hold him.

When I got home I found Aaron and Shefa in the back yard playing so I hung out with them and sunned my belly. Shefa caught this great picture of Aaron trying to figure out where my bellybutton was.

He's so much fun and wicked smart. We got a chance to hang out together, just the two of us, and play until Jonah got home. We haven't had much one on one time lately and I really enjoyed dancing to Adam and the Ants and playing cars with him.

Winding down...

Well I am 38 weeks pregnant now and it is just a matter of time before I will be at home with an infant to care for 24 / 7. This weekend it began to dawn on me I needed to to start mentally preparing for this new role. A month or more ago I received a book from my Dad called "Mothering The New Mother" by Sally Placksin and I highly recommend it. The book covers all aspects of the postpartum experience and seems to be an honest guide about the highs and the lows that can be expected. It was nice to get some insight into just how HUGE a change we are about to experience and some tools to help with the transition.

I have always been a pretty independent person who has taken on most challenges and figured things out by myself. Learning to ask for help or accepting it has been challenging to me. I am vowing to myself right now to (these are in no particular order):
1. Ask for help and for what I need.
2. Establish a support group of other mothers.
3. Allow other people to take care of me.
4. Make space for Marc and I to bond with our son.

Marc is leaving for a business trip tomorrow, which made me nervous at first. I realized today that this is really my last chance to have some alone time. I do not believe that Isaac will come early, though I do have a back up plan just in case. In the meanwhile, I am going to take this opportunity to do some things that I want to do and to find a peaceful space for myself.

Help Support baby Ben and CF

This little boy's story really touched me. He is the son of a friend and I really wanted to do something to help out. Please read the note from my friend Michelle below and contribute if you feel so moved...

As some of you know (and some of you may not), a very close friend of mine had a beautiful baby boy, Benjamin Anthony Pannecouck, on March 10. After surgery and testing, Ben was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis and is currently in the hospital, getting stronger and stronger with everyday. You can see pictures and read more about Ben on the link below.http://benjaminanthony.blogspot.com/

In support of research and an eventual cure for this disease, please help me reach my goal in my CF walk in San Francisco on May 3rd, and hopefully surpass it by donating whatever you can. Every little bit helps. For more information on CF and to donate easily, please go to the following link:http://www.cff.org/Great_Strides/MichellePlattIf you are interested in donating and do not prefer donating online, please respond to this email and I will contact you. If you know of anyone else who would like to donate, please pass this on. The more awareness, the closer we can come to a cure.

Thank you for your donations and support, it truly means the world to little B